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WHEELS ON WATER INVENTOR: SBK ENGINEERING Somewhere there are people who have always wanted to ride their mountain bikes on water. On the theory that no demand shall go unsupplied, Italian company SBK offers the Shuttle-Bike Kit. Ride to the edge of a lake or stream; within 10 minutes, inflate two pontoons with a specially designed air pump and attach the gear with a series of hooks. While you're at it, try to think of something even more ridiculous for the SBK folks to invent.
CANCER-FREE CALLING INVENTOR: CALGON CARBON Studies on the potential dangers of cellular-phone radiation remain inconclusive, but WaveZorb, a thumbnail-size piece of carbon cloth that costs about eight bucks, could make them moot. Tests show that WaveZorb, adapted from military use, soaks up nearly 99% of microwave radiation--and doesn't interfere with performance. Each adhesive-backed unit lasts about six months and can be trimmed to fit any cell-phone earpiece. Too bad it can't screen calls as effectively.
PASSWORD REPLACEMENT INVENTOR: BIOLINK Your brain is big, but it has better things to do than remember an eBay password. Thumbprints, however, have nothing to do--ever. So Biolink's U-Match Mouse comes with a thumb scanner and easy-to-install software that renders passwords obsolete. Up to 10 thumbprints can be held in memory at any time, and parents can limit the access of younger thumbs.
NOW HEAR THIS INVENTOR: GEOFF BALL Hearing-impaired since he was 8, Geoff Ball waited years for someone to create an implantable hearing device. With none forthcoming, he developed one himself. Vibrant Soundbridge is an external processor linked to a skull-mounted internal receiver. Unlike standard hearing aids, which merely amplify sound, the Soundbridge directly vibrates the bones in the middle ear for a more natural sound quality that clarifies background noise and nearly eliminates feedback.
IS SHE OR ISN'T HE? INVENTOR: MERCK Perhaps you didn't know this, but turkeys are sold by gender--toms as cutlets and deli meats, hens as whole birds. So turkey breeders must separate hatchlings at birth. But genetic breeding has made it nearly impossible to tell the difference without, uh, checking the goods, a messy process at best. The Merck team patented Gender-Specific Fading Down, meaning boys are born with black feathers, girls with brown. The colors fade as the turkeys grow.
INTERNET FOR DUMMIES INVENTOR: MYSMART.COM There are people who still don't know how to use the Internet. Online stock-trading firms everywhere feel it is vital to get these folks online. Mysmart.com's smart mouse-pad system is the See 'n Say of Internet browsing. Icons on the mouse pad point the way (mainly to e-commerce sites) for those who just can't deal with Netscape.
WIRELESS WASHING INVENTOR: ARISTON CORP. The technology of laundry isn't sexy. Wireless laundry, however, just might be. Italian manufacturer Ariston's Margarita 2000 is a washing machine equipped with a wireless transmitter for remote programming via cell phone or the Internet, so clothes can be washed and ready when you get home from the store. The folding chip, sadly, is still years away.