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The early years were tough, though not for the reasons the priest might have predicted. Bob thought a husband's role was to provide a nice home--and play golf. Ginnie was crushed when he lingered on the links and missed dinners she had painstakingly prepared. Such problems were resolved with time, therapy and, ironically, Catholicism. Says Bob: "For Catholics, it's a major thing to get divorced."
To combat the divisiveness of Bob's career, the Newharts eschewed the fast-paced Hollywood lifestyle and focused on family life. When Bob was at home doing his weekly television series The Bob Newhart Show and Newhart, he drove the kids to school and attended their plays and recitals. "We never missed any important events in the kids' lives," he boasts. And when he was doing stand-up gigs in Las Vegas or Lake Tahoe, Ginnie would bring their four kids to visit on weekends. Being on the road is a lonely life, says Bob. "Everyone's laughing and having a good time, but you're working. And when the show's over, you go back to that empty hotel room." Having his family around made all the difference.
Ginnie and Bob share a passion for crossword puzzles and spectator sports, and they have a deep mutual empathy. Says Ginnie: "We feel almost as one. If he hurts, I hurt. If I hurt, he hurts." Fortunately, they share the highs as well--and now that Bob has learned to keep an eye on his watch, those highs are in ample supply. --Reported by Rachele Kanigel/Bel Air
DON'T GO TO SLEEP ANGRY
Though statistics vary, two demographic groups are generally found to have particularly high divorce rates: African Americans and teenagers. So Chicago Cubs Hall of Famer Billy Williams and wife Shirley had two strikes against them when they got married in 1960. He was 21; she was 19. And when Billy took off for spring training with the Triple-A Houston Buffaloes two days after the wedding, leaving Shirley in Mobile, Ala., for several months, it could have been Strike 3. Billy's manager saved the game by sending Shirley a plane ticket to visit.
The following year, Billy made it to the majors, and the Williamses and their new baby moved to Chicago. But Billy was on the road a lot, and Shirley was alone in a strange city with four young children. An older woman who befriended Shirley helped her cope. Phone calls and letters also helped. But then there were the groupies. "You don't get a lot of respect as the spouse of a professional athlete," she says. "The fans didn't just ignore me, they'd push me over to get to him." Billy tried to reassure her that he took his marriage vows seriously and arranged for her and his daughters--with tutors--to stay with him during spring training; as the girls got older, Shirley began to join him during the season too. "If you put your family first, everything else gets easier," says Billy, "because you and everyone around you know your priorities."
Through all their ups and downs, the Williamses have adhered to a simple rule: Don't go to bed angry. "We never go to sleep if it's not resolved," says Billy. That has meant some long sleepless nights, but the final score has been worth it. "We have a partnership built on commitment, love and respect," says Shirley. "We are an example for our grandkids and their grandkids." --Reported by Maggie Sieger/Chicago
GIVE EACH OTHER GROWING ROOM