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A similar step-by-step process worked in liberal but heavily Roman Catholic Massachusetts, where a gay-rights bill was enacted in 1989 after 17 years of legislative debate. By 1992, a third of all candidates for state legislature sought endorsement from the 15,000-member Massachusetts Gay and Lesbian Political Caucus; this year, all four gubernatorial hopefuls support gay rights. The Massachusetts Board of Education last year adopted, unanimously, the nation's first state educational policy prohibiting discrimination against gay elementary and secondary students. Last December, Governor William Weld signed a similar bill into law.
By contrast, in even more liberal Hawaii, gays chose to sue for the right to marry, reasoning that many civil rights advances have come from the judiciary. At first they seemed to have won, when the state's highest court last year required government officials to show "compelling interests" against same- sex marriage. Hawaii appeared to be on the verge of allowing such unions, which could have had nationwide significance, because other states would be constitutionally obliged to recognize marriages licensed by Hawaii. But few gay-rights issues are more sensitive; marriage is traditionally the province of religion, and allowing it for gays would treat them as truly the moral equivalent of straights. A Honolulu Advertiser poll found two-thirds of respondents opposed to same-sex marriage. Legislators quashed the idea by more than 3 to 1 and referred it to a study commission, a majority of whose 11 members must belong to specified religious groups -- a proviso that many observers say ensures a negative outcome.
While gays have faced uneven results in the political arena, especially at the national level, they have made great strides in the seemingly less inviting world of private business. Hundreds of companies, including IBM, Eastman Kodak, Harley-Davidson, Dow Chemical, Du Pont, 3M and Time Warner, have specific policies banning discrimination based on sexual orientation. Many, ranging from the Wall Street law firm Milbank, Tweed, Hadley & McCloy to the insurer Blue Cross and Blue Shield of Massachusetts, provide health or other benefits for gay employees' partners. Such old-line companies as Union Carbide and Colgate-Palmolive hire consultants to teach about sexual orientation. Yet many gays still fear that acknowledging their sexuality may hurt their chances for promotion, and stay closeted even at firms that vow equal treatment. A 1992 survey of 1,400 gay men and lesbians in Philadelphia found that 76% of men and 81% of women conceal their orientation at work.
Why do gays have to come out at all? Why can't they just live their lives discreetly? Many do, of course. Some consider themselves out because they tell other gays, or a few straight friends, or some family members. Some believe - the only important announcement is the first -- coming out to oneself. For every drag queen or gender bender who believes life ought to be street theater, dozens if not hundreds of gay men and lesbians avoid confrontation.