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That's a harsh view, of course, and it is one not shared by many of the families who crowd the playing fields and gyms. Even in the most intense programs, the kids will tell you this is what they want: the sheer fun of the game, the tribal bond with teammates, the pride of being selected for a team, and the attention from busy parents who might not make as much of a fuss over a triumph in algebra or Spanish.
Any parent knows that few pleasures match the sight of a child who's flushed and beaming after a romp on a stretch of turf. Travel teams in particular can do much to melt away the inhibitions between parents and their teens. "On about the seventh hour of a road trip from western Pennsylvania," says lawyer Robert Luskin of Washington, "you tend to hear things you wouldn't otherwise."
On the practical side, a child busy with sports is less susceptible to the lure of drugs and gangs and the despair we've lately seen in places like Littleton, Colo. "It keeps kids out of trouble and away from the TV," says Leea Kielpinski, 28, a nurse in Oakland, Calif., whose nine-year-old daughter and seven-year-old son play competitive basketball. Most sports programs, despite their excesses, manage to promote the old virtues: self-confidence, personal responsibility, teamwork, persistence, the ability to win and lose with grace. "In an organized sport, Danny's got to learn a little teamwork, some structure and discipline," says Terrence Straub, a Washington steel executive and father of Daniel, 9, and two older sons.
The benefits can even be measured on the child's report card. "We know from a lot of research that kids who participate in sports tend to do better academically," says Mark Goldstein, a child clinical psychologist at Roosevelt University in Chicago. "It forces them to be more organized with their time and to prioritize a lot better."
Of course, the traditional virtues come wrapped in the garb of the less than traditional 1990s, when prosperity is at an all-time high and leisure at an all-time low. In the Glennon household in Lake Forest, Ill., parents John and Kathy and their three younger daughters have re-arranged family life around the hockey schedule of son Nick, 10. One week's lineup: Sunday: practice from 9 a.m. to 10 a.m. Monday: power skating from 7 p.m. to 8 p.m. Tuesday: game night. Friday: a fund-raising dinner dance for the team. Sunday: another game. And several days a week, Nick joins a group of kids who take an hour of private instruction from the former speed coach of the Chicago Blackhawks.
Beyond the expense in time, there is the expense of, well, expense. Hockey is easily the most costly of the team sports. Nick has been playing since he was five, and this year, says John, 46, an investment banker, the family will spend as much as $4,500 on the boy's hockey habit: for equipment, gas and hotel rooms, summer training camps and the membership fee to the local hockey association, which covers coaches' salaries and rink rentals. "It's worth it," says Nick's mom Kathy. "It provides exercise, discipline and camaraderie." Nick has a slightly different take. "I play to win," he says. "I don't play to play. If I find out I have a team that's going to be 0-8, I'll go with a different team."