The Press: Highly Irregular

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To leaven its solid fare of political and artistic comment, London's socialist New Statesman and Nation conducts weekly "competitions" in epigrams, limericks, etc. Recently readers were asked to play a game originated by Philosopher Bertrand Russell. On BBC's Brains Trust program (Britain's sprightly Town Meeting of the Air), he had humorously conjugated an "irregular verb" as "I am firm; you are obstinate; he is a pig-headed fool."

Last week, from 650 entries, the New Statesman ran some rib-tickling winners: ¶ I am sparkling; you are unusually talkative; he is drunk.

¶ I have the New Look; you have let down your hem; she has had that dress since 1934.

¶ I am righteously indignant; you are annoyed ; he is making a fuss about nothing. ¶ I am frank; you are blatant; he is a Buchmanite.

¶I try to see their point of view; you are muddleheaded; he is a crypto-Communist.

¶ I am a creative writer; you have a journalistic flair; he is a prosperous hack. ¶ I am beautiful; you have quite good features; she isn't bad-looking, if you like that type.

¶ I am religious; you go to church; he plays tennis with the vicar. ¶ I have about me something of the subtle, haunting, mysterious fragrance of the Orient; you rather overdo it, dear; she stinks.