DEPARTMENT
“How many folks this morning watched the President’s press conference? … The rest of his term, he’s committed to one thing: he’s going to disarm Iran, he’s going to disarm Korea and he’s going to disarm Cheney.” –DAVID LETTERMAN
“Donald and his wife Melania Trump gave birth this morning to a baby boy. They named him Barron William Rothschild Fabergé Egg Trump. Cute kid. He really takes after his father–barely a day old and he has already bankrupted two casinos.”
–JIMMY KIMMEL
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