If it had been a less abusive word than "bitch," Newt Gingrich might not have been thrown off-message on the biggest day of his political life. Long after the debate is over about whether Connie Chung should have broadcast Kathleen Gingrich's recollection of what her son thought of the First Lady, the epithet of choice against uppity women will hang in the air, a reminder that women have not come such a long way. Like the word penis (before one was cut off), bitch (before the Speaker's mother used it) seldom found its way onto the nightly news. It was too sexual, too nasty to invoke outside gangsta rap and the barracks. "Remember," says language expert and New York Times columnist William Safire, "it's so offensive that Barbara Bush didn't use it but said that what Geraldine Ferraro was 'rhymes with rich.' " Defined by Webster as "the female of the dog, a lewd or immoral woman," it is uttered -- but usually only in private -- about such strong women as Margaret Thatcher, Jeane Kirkpatrick and Roseanne. Colorado Representative Pat Schroeder, who pressed for an investigation of Tailhook, says she has been called the "Wicked Bitch of the West" for her trouble. T shirts trumpeting 1,952 Bulldogs and 1 Bitch greeted Shannon Faulkner when she enrolled at the all-male Citadel, where the mascot is a bulldog. Linguist Deborah Tannen, author of Talking from 9 to 5, says, "Bitch is the most contemptible thing you can say about a woman. Save perhaps the four-letter C word."
Even men with character flaws as deep as the Grand Canyon feel entitled to hurl the insult. When Mayor Marion Barry was caught smoking crack in a sting operation mounted by the male-dominated FBI, his first reaction was, "Bitch set me up." On the famed 911 tape, O.J. reportedly shouted at Nicole, "I don't want you in my house, you bitch!"
There is no equivalent epithet about men. Bastard and son of a bitch have less sting, in part because society expects -- and rewards -- toughness in men. The only comparable insult to hurl at a man is to question his manliness. The charge George Bush resented the most was being called "wimp."
So why should women be reduced to animals in heat for attending an all-male school or being the first woman to run for Vice President? "Bitch is the archetypal slur against the woman who talks with certainty, makes bold statements rather than hedged ones, acts with authority," says Tannen. "The reaction is, 'Who does she think she is?' and she will be disliked." While men have a wide latitude in how they behave in public, women still have to tread a tightrope. Mimic in the mildest form the behavior of a male colleague, and you will be sorry. I know something about this because of the stack of hate mail that arrives if I so much as frown at Robert Novak on CNN's Capital Gang. He can shout me down, insisting I don't know what I'm talking about and be deluged with fan mail. If I go so far as to say "Let me finish," letters arrive about how strident and shrill I am -- and, yes, what a bitch.
What the Clintons don't understand as they make nice with the Gingriches is that the offense is not that the First Lady hasn't been gracious enough but that she has presumed too much. As Hillary was inviting Gingrich and Mom to the White House, buttons were spotted on Capitol Hill: SHE IS.