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Public bewilderment at the disease is taking many forms. Conservative leaders see it as a summons to chastity or monogamy. Many people, dealing with the absolute death sentence that AIDS imposes, consider it a vague sort of retribution, an Old Testament-style revenge. Says a Los Angeles entertainment writer: "Sexual disease has been around for thousands of years. It reappears when monogamy breaks down. AIDS pushes monogamy right back up there on the priority list." An Atlanta executive concludes, "We are paying for our sins of the '60s, when one-night stands and sex without commitment used to be chic." More than anything, the public wants guidelines, new rules for unprecedented circumstances. The definition of "high-risk sexual activity" is chilling: according to health experts, it includes fellatio and vaginal and anal sex without a condom, and cunnilingus without a shield. Anyone engaging in sex with a new partner or with a long-term partner whose sexual history is unknown is at risk. No wonder health departments and services have been deluged by phone calls. AID Atlanta, a hot line designed to help gays, finds that 85% of its callers are heterosexuals who fear they might have the disease. Moreover, 40% of calls to the AIDS hot line in Illinois are from worried women. "Most say, 'I had too much to drink, and I went home with this guy,' " says Director Mary Fleming. "I hear stark terror in heterosexual women, who are deciding to be celibate."
There is reason for women to be alarmed. Kris, 37, is an attractive divorcee from Pasadena, Calif., and the mother of a teenage daughter. In 1983 she embarked on a "sexually indiscriminate" period of her life during which she had about 15 sexual partners. "I never gave a thought to AIDS," recalls Kris. "I didn't even know there was a threat." After two frustrating years of incorrect diagnosis, the disease was finally identified, first as AIDS- related complex, then as AIDS. She does not know who gave her AIDS or whom she might have infected. "I am sure I have passed on the virus. I can't get in touch with him. If I could, I don't know whether to tell him and let him spend the rest of his life worrying, or not tell him and let him go and spread it further."
More than 1,870 women in the U.S. have AIDS. In New York City, which has the highest concentration of victims, 10% of those with the disease are female. ) Women who are sexually active must face some hard choices; playing out Erica Jong's little scenario is not easy. Says Judith Cohen, a University of California at San Francisco epidemiologist who for the past two years has been surveying some 500 women at high risk of catching the virus: "The sheer political and power issues involved in telling someone that you think using a condom would be a good idea are real difficult and complicated. They raise questions like, 'Are you telling me that you already have the virus?' or 'What else have you been doing that's socially unacceptable?' " For many women, especially single women in their 20s, going slowly is the only guideline. Karoline Harrington, 24, an editorial assistant in Manhattan, says couples now have a greater tendency to just "hang out. Foreplay is a big part of it. People want to please each other, but sleeping together is a big deal."