TIME's Weekend Review

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LIFE’S not a word but a sentence, so they say, and it was never more true than for Louise Woodward. The 19-year-old nanny now faces the prospect of entering prison a teenager and leaving it in her fourth decade, at best. This verdict came despite some 70 percent of the opinion-polled — and a majority of legal experts — believing her to be innocent of murder in any degree. Of course, twelve good Cambridge folk didn’t see it that way. Did someone say anti-British prejudice? Let’s hope the spirit of the Revolution hasn’t lasted that long.

Dow but Not Out

Louise may fight on, but this week saw the end for Shirley Allen of “Roby Ridge” standoff fame. Shirley, it seems, lost the protection of the gods when she shot a police dog through the nose (thus committing two great American sins in one: attempting to assassinate an authority figure, and injuring an anthropomorphic animal).

It was not, however, the end for the stock market. In what turned out to be the biggest non-story of all time, the Dow went down, up, sideways — basically spending the week going more places than Jiang Zemin. The Dow probably managed to scare more Americans, too.