That we'll always have Miami-Dade, which started too late for the first deadline, quit too early for the second deadline, and now has Gore's lawyers trying to force it to undertake a dimple count it never wanted in the first place, to remind us of how absurd this was.
That we're finally finding out what these two guys are all about.
That evolution produced lawyers, without whom America would be utterly divided on who to blame for this mess.
That those little pieces of paper were not, for bizarre reason, known as "monicas," and that the word "chad" in no way is the kind of term that makes Beavis and Butthead laugh.
That our SAT scores were probably much higher. Stupid machine graders.
That MSNBC plays "Saturday Night Live" clips all day Sunday, so we don't have to sit through the whole episode.
That we know now that in case of nuclear war, global pandemic or stock market crash, President George W. Bush would be able to stay on message.
That after all this is over, Al Gore — win or lose — is planning to buy 117 hours of prime time to explain, in terms we can understand, why he won or lost. And how he was right all along.
For Alan Greenspan.
That if Bush wins, he will never speak of this again.
That we've nearly forgotten how Gore's and Bush's prescription-drug plans stacked up.
That Bush probably has too.
That a Bush administration would have Dick Cheney's heart to keep W. on his toes.
That a Gore administration would likely have Dick Holbrooke to make it watchable.
That the Electoral College system is there to keep the outbreak contained in Florida.
That our electoral apparatus, it turns out, was definitely Y2K-proof.