End of the Ingenue on 'Survivor'

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Last night, on a very un-telegenic "Survivor":

Four scheming, coldhearted, aesthetically challenged members of the dastardly Tagi alliance voted Colleen off the island.

Colleen. She of the tousled hair and the winsome smile, the disarmingly hippiesh philosophizing and yes, the skimpy, skintight wardrobe. And — ugh — of those festering leg sores with the bugs living in them, which have hopefully healed in the months since the 4-2 vote actually happened. Ah, Colleen. The world of island-based reality game shows was not made for one so beautiful as you.

That plank-standing thing for immunity was a woman's game, for small feet and graceful bodies, but once she fell — after an impressive 2 hours and 54 minutes— the island took one more step to becoming a man's world. Sean brought Richard breakfast on the yacht. Rudy and Richard are bonding. And Kelly and Sue are losing their sense of sisterhood, which now that Colleen and Jenna are both gone is no longer fascinating in any way.

Two episodes left. Five survivors — an old guy, a gay guy, a sexless frat-boy doctor, a truck driver and a real pill (with admittedly impeccable balance). All across the nation, CBS' ratings with the 18-34 male demographic are, uh, deflating as we speak. And they sagged further on Thursday morning's "Early Show," when Colleen told a smitten Bryant Gumbel she had turned Playboy down. (Obviously a woman of dignity and taste, with the possible exception of that fling with Greg.)

Put Richard's brain in that body, and she might have won. (I shudder at the thought of that transplant, but she might have.) But Colleen was just cruising through this thing, smiling and tossing her head and dispensing slow-dawning but solid wisdom on the tiny island's Big Picture. On the trivia challenge: "I thought, 'This is gonna be so cool, just like a game show.' Then I was like, 'Wait a minute, we're ON a game show.'"

Good night, sweet princess. Pulau Tiga is a meaner and definitely uglier place without you.