NFL: On Top of the Covers

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Line
Dog
CARDINALS
3
Giants
BILLS
6 1/2
Steelers
Bengals
3
BROWNS
LIONS
3 1/2
Chargers
CHIEFS
2 1/2
Patriots
VIKINGS
13
Bears
Cowboys
9 1/2
EAGLES
RAMS
pick
49'ers
Dolphins
2
COLTS
RAIDERS
7
Broncos
TITANS
7
Ravens
PACKERS
6
Bucs
SAINTS
pick
Falcons
Jaguars
3
JETS

"Mean" Josie Greene
After four weeks of humiliation, I have come to the conclusion that the skills involved in football picks are not in any way part of my makeup — physically or psychologically. Maybe I'd be better off picking the baseball playoffs: Give me the Yanks and the Sox and the Mets and some team from west of the Rockies. Yeah, that's it.

The Steelers haven't been looking so hot lately. I know, I know — that sounds like a cop-out. But it's not. I'm still picking them with 6.5. The BILLS aren't so scary, after all, and I suspect that the Buffalo fans won't have a whole lot in them this week.

Sadly for all us Pittsburgh fans, the BROWNS will prevail this week. They're ticked off, and it's Cincinnati, for goodness' sake. To top it all off, it will be interesting to see the face-off between two of the year's most heralded draft picks. Take Cleveland with three.

In the deeply uninspiring SAINTS-Falcons game, look for Atlanta to get down to business and take the game. Mike Ditka can't do a whole lot with his guys this year, and the insults being hurled from the home bleachers won't help much.

The Rest:
CARDINALS -3 Giants
LIONS +3.5 Chargers
CHIEFS -2.5 Patriots
VIKINGS -13 Bears
Cowboys -9.5 EAGLES
RAMS lose to 49ers
Dolphins -2 COLTS
RAIDERS +7 Broncos
TITANS -7 Ravens
PACKERS -6 Bucs
Jaguars -3 JETS

The K.C. Line
Are the Pats really good enough to remain undefeated after a meeting in Arrowhead with the CHIEFS? The Line would like to say yes. Remembering the 40-point can of whup-ass that Drew Bledsoe opened up on the KC boys last year makes the Line want to say "Oh, yes." Remembering that the Pats didn't cover against the Browns last week, however, brings the Line back to earth, and to pick the Griefs giving up 2.5.

According to our sister publication, Sports Illustrated, the Broncos aren't sure they're going to win a game this season. The K.C. Line isn't convinced either, but this week's lock is that they will keep it closer against the RAIDERS. Take the Broncos and the points.

Repeat after me (and Stephen Sondheim): "The Jets are gonna have their way tonight..." Monday night brings us another helping of Tuna, which should go down easier now that those pesky Broncos have been disposed of. These JETS are getting 3 points in the Meadowlands, which one can only put down to the Rick Mirer discount. Still, the Jags have looked more like kittens so far this year, at least on offense. Jets win, say 10-8.

The Rest:
CARDINALS -3 Giants
BILLS -6.5 Steelers
Bengals -3 BROWNS
LIONS -3.5 Chargers
CHIEFS -2.5 Patriots
Bears +13 VIKINGS
EAGLES +9.5 Cowboys
49'ers pick RAMS
COLTS +2 Dolphins
TITANS -7 Ravens
Bucs +6 PACKERS
SAINTS pick Falcons



And from L.I. Slim:

RAIDERS –7 over Broncos When a team says "We’re finished" and could go 0-8, they’re pretty dern likely to go 0-8. Take the silver-and-black in a walk at home.

TITANS –7 over Ravens And when a team says they need to beat the Ravens – who don’t really deserve that much respect – to win their division, they’re pretty dern likely to beat those Ravens. They probably would’ve anyway.

Steelers +6.5 over BILLS Yes, the Bills are for real, and yes, they’re at home. Yes, the Steelers aren’t very promising. But so help Slim, he just can’t resist. The beginning of the comeback starts up north.

And the rest:
CARDINALS –3 over Giants
BROWNS +3 over Bengals
LIONS -3.5 over Chargers
Patriots +2.5 over CHIEFS
VIKES –13 over Bears
Cowboys –9.5 over EAGLES
49'ers Pick over RAMS
COLTS +2 over Dolphins
Bucs –6 over PACKERS
SAINTS Pick over Falcons