Bachmann, Rep. Michele
intention of to strike a major blow against the empire and refuse to answer most of next year's census questions
claim by that the King of Jordan is a "fan of Transformers" cries out for an emphatic royal denial
strong desire of to NOT BE CALLED "LIZ"!!!
Block, Francesca Lia
burning yes, actual setting fire to of latest book by is urged by group of Christian extremists in Wisconsin
increase in backyard raising of, to the general dismay of next-door neighbors
Clinton, Secretary of State Hillary
fractured elbow of
Facebook posting about an escaped gorilla prompts racist comment by "I'm sure it's just one of Michelle's ancestors" that leads to the loss of the job of and the offering of the obligatory apology by
interview is granted by with the condition that no questions be asked about the only things people want answers about from, and the craven Washington Post agrees
Ensign, Sen. John
severe setback is suffered by rumored 2012 presidential bid of after oh-so-deep regret is expressed by and, really, how could it not have been, given the pious pronouncements of about the "sanctity" of marriage in the service of crusading against allowing gays to partake in it, and the membership of in the marital-fidelity-promoting male evangelical group the Promise Keepers, and the strident demands of for the resignations of Larry Craig and Bill Clinton in connection with their sex scandals for a nine-month affair had by with a campaign staffer married to a friend of
song is co-written by with pregnant girl friend of
regret is expressed by, not for sending out a racist email a collage of images of the 44 presidents with Obama represented by a pair of white eyes against a black background but merely for sending it out to the wrong list of people
racist tweet "JUST HEARD OBAMA IS GOING TO IMPOSE A 40% TAX ON ASPIRIN BECAUSE IT'S WHITE AND IT WORKS" is apologized for by
efforts of to make ethnic studies in Tucson public schools illegal because they're "designed to promote ethnic chauvinism"
jurors in Italian trial of for the throat-slitting murder of roommate of are told by that "from what I saw in CSI these things are not quick or pleasant" but, rather, "shocking, yucky, disgusting"
Lieberman, Sen. Joseph
Guantanamo is described by as "as humane a facility as you're gonna find for prisoners of war"
Mohammed, Khalid Shaikh
claims of that torture led to making up of stuff by
New York City
drivers in are found to be America's angriest and most aggressive "most likely to wave their fists or arms... most likely to lay on the horn... most likely to make some sort of obscene gesture" in road rage survey
New York Post
evident sense of that the circumstances of David Carradine's death were insufficiently humiliating prompts revelation by that, in addition to his fatal affinity for ultra-kinky sex, he was a lousy tipper
Obama, President Barack
emptiness of post-Inauguration pronouncement by that "my Administration is committed to creating an unprecedented level of openness in Government" is exposed by refusal of to reveal names of visitors to the White House
Palin, Gov. Sarah
praise for U.S. troops is hamhandedly jammed into grudging sort-of-acceptance by of David Letterman's abject apology to while the idiotic media babbles about it endlessly as if any of it had any significance whatsoever beyond the amusing fact that a national punch line is complaining about a joke
risqué double entendre about is unapologetically offered by Andy Borowitz
Panetta, C.I.A. Director Leon
Cheney's recent national security speech prompts observation by that "it's almost as if he's wishing that this country would be attacked again, in order to make his point"
El Pollo Loco
KFC is accused of grilling chicken with beef ingredients by
flushing of down London toilet is survived by
zombieness of is pointed out by lifelong member of, who also notes its "goonish intolerance" and "halitosis of self-righteousness"
good grief, they still can't stop talking about
ad campaign is launched by
controversy about current whereabouts of suit worn by on the day of acquittal of serves as reminder that ha ha! a jail cell is home to now
links of to anti-immigration vigilante organization charged with the murder of a man and his nine-year-old daughter
praise of in connection with this week's use of by Iranians is put in perspective
Dan Froomkin, the single best journalist at, is fired by, while unreadable hacks like Richard Cohen and David Broder (you know, the "dean" of the navel gazers) and torture defenders Charles Krauthammer and Bill Kristol are retained by