Player of the Day

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Age: 221 years young.

Appearance:Less than 70 square miles of officialdom and low-rise suburbia.

Why's D.C. in the news now? More murder stats? Marion Barry smoking crack again? Actually, the city came out first in its division in Money's Best Places to Live.

You've got to be kidding. What about the violent crime? Okay, 679.9 incidents per 100,000 people don't exactly make D.C. streets the safest. But...

And the public schools are a shambles. True, spending $3,093 per student is pretty miserly.

So what's to love? Are you insane? The Smithsonian, the Aerospace museum, Georgetown, the Redskins...

Shame about the muggings, though. According to Money's survey, we don't rate crime as highly as arts, culture and health when choosing our abode.

Health? Hey, D.C. has 305 M.D.'s per capita. You'll never want for a doctor.

Especially not when you need that vital bullet extraction. Exactly.