1. At 11:30 a.m., when a man fired at the White House, President Bush was:
a) Waking that laggard Cheney b) Praying Gore aims as poorly as he campaigns c) Cowering behind Karen Hughes' bulletproof hair d) Exercising in the residence
2. This giant swatch of German cloth is:
a) Attracting bulls from all over Europe b) The world's largest pair of underpants c) Getting a little lift in the crotch d) Part of the long-awaited, though poorly attended, Dom DeLuise lingerie fair
3. As an early Valentine's Day gift, Puffy gave J. Lo:
a) A brand-new nickname: "Fer. Pez"...