Cell-Phone Zapper

I had everything I needed to put a stop to too-loud public blathering--except a battery pack

I am not a wuss. And yet I've never told people to pipe down when they were disturbing my peace with their too-loud blatherings on a cell phone. I let them disrupt my naps on the morning train. I even turn the other cheek in restaurants or at the movie theater. Instead, I quietly simmer, indulging violent fantasies that involve the loud-mouthed caller's being stranded in a swamp with nothing but his cell phone and a starving, 1,200-lb. alligator named Big 'un.

Recently, though, I came into possession of what may be the ultimate weapon for people like me who hate...

Want the full story?

Subscribe Now


Get TIME the way you want it

  • One Week Digital Pass — $4.99
  • Monthly Pay-As-You-Go DIGITAL ACCESS$2.99
  • One Year ALL ACCESSJust $30!   Best Deal!
    Print Magazine + Digital Edition + Subscriber-only Content on TIME.com

Learn more about the benefits of being a TIME subscriber

If you are already a subscriber sign up — registration is free!