Don Quixotes, We Salute You

Voters seem less than inspired by the candidates this election, creating the perfect environment for the emergence of viable third parties. But after a careful examination of the self-made, buck-the-Establishment politicos who are making a run for office this year, we declare the following pretty much unelectable. Nice try, though.

NATURAL MEDICINE PARTY Wash. Attorney General-wannabe Stan Lippmann is pro-self-prescribed drugs, anti-mandatory vaccination.

LIGHT PARTY Calif. Presidential candidate Dr. Da Vid's (ne Dolph Ornstein) mantra is health, peace and freedom for all.

PROHIBITION PARTY Colo. As well as outlawing booze, five-time Prez candidate Earl Dodge wants to nix the Federal Reserve.


Want the full story?

Subscribe Now


Learn more about the benefits of being a TIME subscriber

If you are already a subscriber sign up — registration is free!