Canada with an Accent

I have wanted to go to Australia since I was 11 and read On the Beach, the novel about nuclear apocalypse in which the only surviving people were Australians who ate cyanide capsules and died. My parents' marriage, I now realize, must have been having some problems around that time. So when TIME told me it was sending me to Australia for the Olympics, I admit I was more excited about the free trip than the Games themselves. But after five days of traveling, I'm starting to suspect this isn't the swaggering, crocodile-hunting country it claims to be. In fact, Australia...

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