Spring Back, Comrades

They say spring ahead, we spring ahead. They say fall back, we fall back. But come this Sunday at 2 a.m., I--in the noble tradition of Mohandas Gandhi and Frank Bruno--will nonviolently resist. And on Monday, like Martin Luther King Jr., I will sit alone with a pen and paper and draft my "Letter from a Manhattan Restaurant Where I'm Alone Because I'm an Hour Late to Meet a Friend."

I have hated daylight-saving time since the 153rd time it was explained to me. I hate the useless mnemonic device (Why can't you "spring back" or "fall ahead"?). I hate getting...

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