I've Been Acquired

There has been a lot of coverage of this AOL-Time Warner merger, but none of it has really pinpointed how it will affect me. Not only did the Time Warner share price jump on Monday to $90.06, making my portfolio worth $180.12, but I also suddenly had a whole new group of co-workers to hit on. I wasn't sure what the Securities and Exchange Commission rules are about waiting periods, but I figured I should get right to it so I could get the jump on Ted Turner.

I called the AOL headquarters in Dulles, Va., and introduced myself to the...

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