All the News That's Unfit

You say the real headlines are too wacky to parody these days? Then you haven't seen the Onion

You might expect that a news entity that calls itself "America's Finest News Source" would want the boast spoken by James Earl Jones and accompanied by John Williams theme music. In fact, the title has been appropriated by the Onion, a droll weekly newspaper published in Madison, Wis., devoted to producing deadpan, dead-on parodies of the resolutely low-key news reports wire services put out. Consider these recent headlines:

--STARR TAUNTS CLINTON WITH HUMILIATING "SITTIN' IN A TREE" SONG ("Bill and Monica/ Sittin' in a tree/ K-I-S-S-I-N-G," Starr sang to reporters at a Washington Hilton press conference...")

--STATE DEPARTMENT TO...

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