Going All Out for Scandal

Yes, I think I'd like to have one or two final shudders and then go about my business. For one thing, I am no longer confident that I have a store of euphemisms adequate to sustaining the discussion. My language consultants already advised me that I'd have to come up with something better for "semen" than "icky poo."

These days I've been thinking a lot of a guy in my high school I'll call Leonard, who was said to know 58 terms for the female breast. He used the terms constantly, and unexpectedly. A few of us would be talking about...

Want the full story?

Subscribe Now


Get TIME the way you want it

  • One Week Digital Pass — $4.99
  • Monthly Pay-As-You-Go DIGITAL ACCESS$2.99
  • One Year ALL ACCESSJust $30!   Best Deal!
    Print Magazine + Digital Edition + Subscriber-only Content on TIME.com

Learn more about the benefits of being a TIME subscriber

If you are already a subscriber sign up — registration is free!