MY FIRST TWO WEEKS ON DR. WEIL'S HEALTH REGIMEN

At first glance, Dr. Andrew Weil's 8 Weeks to Optimum Health plan looks easy. Dr. Weil, reasonable fellow, says eat salmon, olive oil, garlic, soy sauce, ginger, broccoli. I like all that stuff. But Weil, dietary despot, also suggests eating tofu, which is organic styrofoam; drinking Japanese green tea, which tastes like water in which tadpoles have died; and popping 6,000 mg a day of vitamin C, which sours my giblets. I'll give these a miss. And, ouch, here it comes: "Moderate or eliminate intake of animal foods, booze, coffee and news."

Animal foods? Sure, I'll cut out those trashburgers. Booze?...

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