If life were fair, if this were a just world, if the prayers of small boys (and large men) were answered, baseball fans would have turned on the late sports news last Friday night to hear something like this:
"Hey, guys and gals, this is Biff Bixley with the scores. Another great night for baseball. Dingers were flying everywhere. Thirty-two home runs, including a clout by Matt Williams of the Giants that looks like it went into orbit. Roll that tape! Is this ball juiced or what? With 44 taters, the Mattmeister has now moved ahead of Roger Maris' record pace....
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