The Absolutely Last Oscar Piece You Have to Read in 1994

AIR TIE ALERT. Of 24 male performers who either presented or won awards at last week's Academy Awards ceremony, seven -- 29% -- didn't wear ties. Two recently fashionable items were also not in great evidence on stage: red ribbons and faux-brainy eyewear.

MEMENTO WE'D LEAST LIKE TO SEE. "If I had known how famous he was going to be, I'd have had my uterus bronzed." -- Leah Adler, on her famous son Steven Spielberg

BEST PERFORMANCE IN ARMANI AND A HEADSET. How did the agents do? Of the seven winners in the acting, writing and directing categories, CAA represents three...

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