Civilization aspires to femininity. History has made man's age-old tools of muscles and marauding nearly obsolete; it urges him to put down swords and pick up phones, to value salon charm over brute force, to face adversity through nurturing and networking instead of a quick body chop. What a lovely evolution: men are becoming women. Except in movies, of course -- especially summer movies, where the O.K. Corral never closes and the footfalls of dinosaurs named Arnold and Sly still shake the earth.
So raise a tender toast to Orlando: a sensation at film festivals, a hit in Britain, and, once...