ATTENTION BUYERS! Brand-new shipment just in. Unusual opportunity. Our best consignment ever. $20 million worth of choice Florida properties: sun-coast condos, apartment complexes and, the jewel of the lot, a one-of-a-kind Thoroughbred- and show-horse ranch with 14 rare Paso Finos, prized for their steady ride and high-stepping gait. All offerings are in good shape, previously owned by suspected drug kingpins. (They buy the best.) A steal. Remember our motto at Uncle Sam's: We seize from the sleaze. Their loss is America's gain.
The Government may not hawk goods like a job-lot auction house, but it is becoming quite a bargain hunter....
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