Education: New Fardels for the Bard

No thees or thous in a streamlined Shakespeare

Suppose you wanted to modernize Shakespeare, pull him up by his Elizabethan pantoffles and bring his 37 plays into our more streamlined age. Do not ask why you would want to engage in such a bootless enterprise; just assume it was your task. Well, first you would change the thees, the thous, the thys and the thines. Instead of "O Romeo, Romeo! wherefore art thou Romeo?"—one of the Bard's most famous questions—you would have Juliet ask, "Wherefore art you Romeo?" The archaic verb must go as well, of course, and what you wind up...

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