Election '84: A national campaign is better than the best circus.

Monarchies spill over with ceremonies.

Democracies use so few, and ours tend to look like Abbott and Costello movies, a cross between bacchanals and pajama parties. Where is the dignity in a presidential election campaign? Where are the issues of substance? Let us consider the matter with deep seriousness as the red, white and blue balloons shower down on our funny hats and a tuba ooms in our ears. More noise, please. (Is this your baby, madam? Extraordinary. Of course, I'll kiss him... her.)

Yet there must be something to these inelegant pep rallies, some reason millions of normal citizens jump up and...

Want the full story?

Subscribe Now

Subscribe
Subscribe

Learn more about the benefits of being a TIME subscriber

If you are already a subscriber sign up — registration is free!