What Will They Think of Next?

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IS SHE OR ISN'T HE?
INVENTOR: MERCK
Perhaps you didn't know this, but turkeys are sold by gender--toms as cutlets and deli meats, hens as whole birds. So turkey breeders must separate hatchlings at birth. But genetic breeding has made it nearly impossible to tell the difference without, uh, checking the goods, a messy process at best. The Merck team patented Gender-Specific Fading Down, meaning boys are born with black feathers, girls with brown. The colors fade as the turkeys grow.

INTERNET FOR DUMMIES
INVENTOR: MYSMART.COM
There are people who still don't know how to use the Internet. Online stock-trading firms everywhere feel it is vital to get these folks online. Mysmart.com 's smart mouse-pad system is the See 'n Say of Internet browsing. Icons on the mouse pad point the way (mainly to e-commerce sites) for those who just can't deal with Netscape.

WIRELESS WASHING
INVENTOR: ARISTON CORP.
The technology of laundry isn't sexy. Wireless laundry, however, just might be. Italian manufacturer Ariston's Margarita 2000 is a washing machine equipped with a wireless transmitter for remote programming via cell phone or the Internet, so clothes can be washed and ready when you get home from the store. The folding chip, sadly, is still years away.

COOL LAPS
INVENTOR: RAY NOVOTNY
For the literal-minded few who insist on actually propping their laptop computers on their laps, the consequence can be an extreme case of warm thighs. The Laptop Soft-Seat, made of lightweight aluminum, absorbs the excess heat and keeps computers and knees cool. So does a table, but then that was invented a while ago.

PRENASAL DRIP
INVENTOR: MURRAY GROSSAN, M.D.
Kids are always sticking stuff up their nose, so they might as well try something good for 'em, right? The Grossan Nasal Irrigator, a (yikes) pulsating nasal douche, attaches to a WaterPik to clean the area where a common cold becomes a raging flu. Yes, a few people have complained of discomfort, but nasal irrigation is a staple of traditional Indian medicine, and it does improve ciliary function and keep sinus tissue moist.

SPEEDING UP THE GENE POOL
INVENTORS: GAVIN MACBEATH AND STUART SCHREIBER
Sequencing of the human genome may be the greatest breakthrough in human history, but it is just a beginning. To get to the good stuff, like gene therapy and hyperefficient drugs, scientists need to analyze the chemistry of 50,000-100,000 proteins encoded by our genes. But proteins are notoriously complex and finicky (a little heat or mishandling, and they break down like Scarlett O'Hara) and need to be treated gingerly in a process that was expected to take decades. Harvard biochemists MacBeath and Schreiber have found a way to speed things up with Protein Microarrays. Using a robotic arm and a tiny quill, they will allow researchers to deposit 10,000 functional proteins onto a single microscope slide and quickly probe how each interacts with other proteins and potential drugs.

EASILY RECYCLED PAPER
INVENTOR: TOSHIBA
To recycle printed paper by removing ink chemically is expensive. But by reversing the procedure used to create thermal paper (the waxy stuff used in old fax machines and cash-register receipts), Toshiba engineers figured out a way to make Disappearing Ink, which vanishes with a blast of heat. There goes another excuse for not recycling.

GUT CHECK
INVENTOR: GIVEN IMAGING
Innerspace was a lousy movie, but it had a nice idea. If we could see inside the human body, it would be a lot easier to pinpoint exactly what was wrong. The Given Diagnostic Imaging System is a camera tucked inside a tiny capsule that, when swallowed, takes a sci-fi jaunt through the body, beaming detailed color images to a patient-worn belt that are then downloaded onto a computer for analysis. It's cool--and currently being tested overseas--but FDA approval is still years away, and so far doctors have been plagued by an inability to maneuver the capsule. We believe Martin Short is available.