ECONOMICS: Harvest Shmoon

The capitalist system last week faced a new menace. It was the shmoo (plural: shmoon, or colloquially, shmoos).

Menace to Hoomanity. The shmoo is a small animal which looks like an animated ham. From its round rump a plumpish neck narrows toward a tiny head; from above a sparse mustache, a pair of trusting eyes peer myopically but ingratiatingly at the world. In the words of the greatest living authority on shmoos: "They lays aigs at th' slightest excuse! They also gives milk. And as fo' meat—broiled, they makes th' finest steaks; fried, they come out th' yummiest chicken." The...

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