Music: Diskmanship

Innocent people think that to enjoy music all they need is a phonograph, a few records, and a little time. The record connoisseur knows better. He finds it is his duty to discuss the merits and demerits of any record ever made, from Aaronovich's fluffed trill in Op. O to Zzinzer's fallow tempos in Op. Posth. He predates the much-publicized hi-fi bug (who specializes in woofers, super-tweeters and push-pull amplifier circuits), but not until now has anyone tried to organize the record connoisseur's guerrilla war and set down some basic strategy.

The task is...

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