Sport: Croquet on the Green

The dedicated Sunday golfer is a testament to hope. He falls over backward on the tee because Gary Player does. He cuts his ball nearly in half, trying to make it back up on the green just like Arnold Palmer. He crouches like Jack Nicklaus and peers curiously into the cup—looking for goodness knows what. When he smothers a drive, it is a "controlled hook," and when he shanks an approach, he is "opening up the green." He talks cunningly of "snakes" and "beaches" and "froghair,"* and he coyly buys hole-in-one insurance to pay...

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