"We love the country, of course " said Macy's, Manhattan's biggest department store, in a holiday ad this week. "The air is so fresh, the grass is so green, the animals are so audible. But . . . Does the country love us?" Pausing to "survey the blandishments that have lured many a New Yorker away from the safe familiarity of asphalt pavements and carbon monoxide," Macy's offered its own glossary of country terms and phrases for New Yorkers. Excerpts:
Barbecue: The food is burned.
Clambake: The food is buried, but it's burned.
Let's-draw-lots-to-see-who-cooks: The food should be buried.
Casual clothes: What you're...