Be honest. Did you actually write this?
I wrote this one. But I know what you mean. Most celebrities, there's one word each page and there's a Laura Ashley drawing of a cat. That's what I wanted to avoid.
The book recounts a true childhood drama involving roast beef and a comb. How does your family feel about it?
It's not exactly Roots. They all remember the incident.
Is it true you don't spend the money you make from The Tonight Show?
People make such a big deal out of this. I never wanted to make my living as a TV personality. My mother always said, "Just finish college so you have something to fall back on." [Stand-up comedy] has always been my thing; [the show is] just something to fall back on.
How many cars do you have now?
You sound like my wife. About 80.
How do you decide what to drive to work?
Well, I'm sure there are people with bigger problems.