People

By Josh Tyrangiel Sunday, May 11, 2003
    • Weird Al Loses Himself
    People of the world, rejoice! After a four-year hiatus, WEIRD AL YANKOVIC (yes, that's him at left) has a new album, Poodle Hat, out May 20. "I tend to look at my albums like time capsules," says Yankovic. "I can't let anything go by without commenting." Thus Nelly's Hot in Herre gets retitled Trash Day (We're guessing: "There's so much trash in here"), while the Backstreet Boys' I Want It That Way is reworked as eBay. (Two birds, one stone.) But the main event is the eagerly awaited Eminem spoof, Couch Potato. "I've wanted to do Eminem for a long time because he's the closest thing we have to a superstar," says Yankovic. "But a lot of his songs are sort of tongue in cheek already. Lose Yourself was so serious that it was perfectly ripe." But at the request of the rapper, Potato won't come with an accompanying video. "Eminem thought that a video might detract from 8 Mile and people might not take him seriously." It's a problem Al has been battling all his life.

    Can Jordan Cross Over? The Jury Is Still Out
    Magic Johnson had his talk show. MICHAEL JORDAN had the Wizards. After 3 1/2 seasons at the helm of Washington's aggressively mediocre NBA team (and two seasons as the team's oldest and best player), Jordan got his walking papers last week in a rage-filled, 18min. meeting with Wizards' owner Abe Pollin. Jordan argued that as the greatest player in the history of the game — and as the man whose return to the court lined Pollin's pockets with $30 million of unanticipated revenue — he deserved more time to turn things around. Pollin countered that Jordan was a poor executive (he commuted to D.C. from his home in Chicago), a poor judge of talent (he drafted disappointing Kwame Brown as the team's No. 1 pick) and a poor father figure for that talent (he called Brown a "flaming f_____" during an intersquad game, according to the Washington Post). He did think Jordan was a pretty good ballplayer, though. With all that out of the way, the two finished by cursing at each other. It was that kind of meeting. Jordan already has an offer to join the Charlotte, N.C., expansion franchise; Pollin has a lot of seats to fill.


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    I'll Scratch Your Back ...
    Everyone wants to know the secrets behind the May-November romance of HARRISON FORD and CALISTA FLOCKHART. Finally, Interview magazine has the red-hot scoop: an interview of Ford — by Flockhart! Some revealing highlights:

    CF: You have four really nice, beautiful children. Do you like the hip-hop they play?

    HF: Yes, there's some rap I do like very much. I like Eminem, Blackalicious.

    CF: What do you think is the primary factor that is motivating the war with Iraq?

    HF: Economics.

    CF: Do you ever regret becoming an actor?

    HF: No.

    CF: Can you cry on cue?

    HF: Huh?

    CF: Why do you wear Wranglers?

    HF: Because they make my butt look so good.

    CF: This interview isn't about me, but who is your favorite actress?

    HF: You.

    CF: Good answer.

    I Pity the Clay Fool
    Everybody hates reruns, but everybody loves clay animation. CONAN O'BRIEN did the math. On May 15, Late Night will air TV's first clay-animated rerun. "This took four very low-paid people a long time to do," says O'Brien. "And thank God we didn't have the money to do it right, because that would have looked really boring." The Mr. Bill — style animation covers all aspects of the repeat, from the monologue to guests MR. T, Richard Lewis and Johnny Knoxville — even the movie-promo clips. "In some of the shots you'll see a hand come in and adjust a head or something," says O'Brien. "It may be the least professional clay animation ever broadcast." If the fake Conan is a hit, can a real, live Craig Kilborn be far behind?