Who Gets the Stuff?

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That is the crux of the problem. Parents don't want to think about their death either, and nobody wants to talk about it. But, say experts, parents need to be parents one last time. "It's selfish not to take care of these end-of-life issues," says Belcher, "and selfish not to communicate with your kids about them." More important, it's the final statement you make as a parent. Done openly, it will ensure the greatest legacy of all: family members who remain friends after you're gone.