Let Them Eat Cake

How many bake-sale brownies would it take to re-elect a President?

Illustration by Tomasz Walenta for TIME; Cookie/Getty Images; Crumbs/Corbis

The best part of being a Journalist is that whenever someone asks me to contribute to a candidate, I tell them I'm not allowed to since it would compromise my objectivity. I have no idea if this is true. We're probably not supposed to eat and drink as much free stuff as I did at the Google party at the Democratic National Convention either, but that didn't stop me from washing down chocolate-covered bacon with gin fizzes or from mentioning in this column how much I love to use Google.

But when I drove down my street in Hollywood and passed...

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