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Numen/For UseóBrit Insurance Design Awards

GOOD WEEK/ BAD WEEK

Rodarte

Natalie Portman accepted her Oscar in a gown by the label and thanked the designers during her speech.

John Galliano

Christian Dior's creative director was fired March 1 amid allegations of anti-Semitic outbursts.

SPORTS

Strike!

According to the U.S. Bowling Congress, more-advanced balls and lanes have led to a 59-fold increase in the number of perfect games rolled in bowling leagues from 1970 to 2010. The rental shoes? Still not so good.

MUSIC

Alderman Rhymefest?

What's the most interesting part of Grammy-winning rapper Che "Rhymefest" Smith's bid to become Chicago's 20th Ward alderman? Is it his list of misdemeanor convictions? His 2006 meeting with now British PM David Cameron? The fact that he once beat Eminem in a freestyle rap contest? No, the most interesting thing about Rhymefest's bid is that he just might win; he will face incumbent Willie Cochran in a runoff April 5.

VERBATIM

Charlie Sheen, Unplugged

It was hard to pick our favorites among the colorful remarks made recently by the Two and a Half Men star. Hard but not impossible.

'Clearly I have defeated this earthworm with my words--imagine what I would have done with my fire-breathing fists.'

'They picked a fight with a warlock.'

'I'm on a drug. It's called Charlie Sheen. It's not available. If you try it once, you will die.'

'I'm tired of pretending like I'm not special. I'm tired of pretending like I'm not bitchin', a total freaking rock star from Mars.'

'Dying is for amateurs.'

TELEVISION

Dancing Card Filled

The announcement of the lineup for ABC's Dancing with the Stars is always an opportunity to contrast the new season's participants with casts gone by. And they are always remarkably similar. The latest "stars" to fill the show's archetypal slots include:

THE LEAD OF AN ICONIC '80S MOVIE

The Karate Kid's Ralph Macchio

THE SUPERMODEL

Petra Nemcova

THE FALLEN STAR

Kirstie Alley

THE FORMER ATHLETE

boxing legend Sugar Ray Leonard

THE INDEFATIGABLE REALITY STAR

former Playboy model Kendra Wilkinson

MOVIES

Speech Impeded

The R-rated version of The King's Speech won Best Picture, but to draw a larger audience, the Weinstein Co. is proceeding with a less profane PG-13 rerelease. Of course, if you want to see Colin Firth being polite, just watch Pride and Prejudice.

BOOKS

Snooki in Wonderland

What if falling down the rabbit hole led you to Seaside Heights, N.J.? Phil Edwards gives Lewis Carroll's classic a Jersey Shore spin with his e-book Snooki in Wonderland, featuring Snooki as Alice, the Situation as the Mad Hatter (a.k.a. the Mad Abber), and the rest of the cast fist-pumping their way through the children's tale. Snooki is available for purchase on the Kindle for 99¬Ę--a pittance for the pleasure of reading "Off with her pouf!"

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