Real Moms of Grosse Pointe

Jobs are in flux, property values have tanked. When you were used to being well off, what do you do now?

By Lynette Clemetson Friday, Sept. 10, 2010
    • Doug Dubois for TIME

    Moms of Grosse Pointe.

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    The Grosse Pointe Moms Club strives to foster frugality without embarrassment. For $35 a year, it offers a weekly roster of playdates and social gatherings. A walking group offers an alternative to gym memberships, and a free kids' music and movement class provides a substitute for paid recreation at places like Gymboree. The group recently decided against participating in a fundraiser at a local boutique so members would not feel pressured to shop.

    April Zaidi, 31, the mother of three boys, ages 1, 3 and 6, hosts the weekly kids' music and movement class. She makes maracas from plastic Easter eggs and drums from empty infant-formula cans. A former glee-club member and drama-camp teacher, she knew she could offer as much as any fancy studio. "I've seen people pay $10 for a half-hour class with a lot of rules. Why should we do that when we can teach the kids for free in the basement?" says Zaidi, who dubs herself Miss Frugal.

    She gave up her job as a graphic designer after baby No. 2 and in 2007 moved to Harper Woods, a short commute from her husband's job as a general-surgery resident at St. John Hospital in Detroit. She bought the furniture for their three-bedroom bungalow on Craigslist and keeps to a strict $140-a-week cash budget. "Everything we have is used, but who cares? With three boys, everything looks used as soon as you get it into the house anyway," she says.

    Huchingson is right up there with Zaidi when it comes to cost cutting. Besides her envied $315 monthly grocery bill, she keeps her two daughters and herself in seemingly effortless style on a monthly family clothing budget of less than $45. "She's like the popular girl because she saves so much," says Boddy. "Saving is like a sport in our group, and everyone wants to know how she does it."

    She has done it, in part, with the help of exceptionally good timing. She and her husband Chris represent a new wave of homeowners in the Pointes. The suburb was too expensive for them before the recession. The Huchingsons bought their 2,000-sq.-ft. (186 sq m), four-bedroom Tudor last year for $180,000. Four years earlier, it sold for $355,000. They both work in growing fields — Diane as a physical therapist and Chris as a website developer.

    Huchingson says they love the new neighborhood and its amenities: fine parks, schools and services. But the bargain-basement price of their house brings some guilt and social awkwardness. They have appealed for lower property taxes — on the grounds that the value of their house has dropped — with some reluctance. Driving down taxes, after all, threatens the services that drew them to Grosse Pointe Park, which in theory threatens the values of their new neighbors' homes. This is the source of quiet tension between the new residents and those who bought at the top of the market, and it's a fault line Huchingson walks with care. "There are some situations that can be uncomfortable," she says. "We're on the opposite end of this whole thing. We have friends in other suburbs who are in jeopardy."

    Club members who have lived in the Pointes for years say they don't begrudge newcomers like Huchingson their cut-rate entry into the community. "We're happy to have these new friends," says Boddy at the coffee gathering at Huchingson's home. "It's just that you cannot help but be shocked at what's happened to the value of your own home."

    It's the ability to get most of those issues out in the open that makes the club a cherished haven, members say. A day before the coffee gathering, Zaidi took her three boys over to Sandra Wiiki's house for a visit. Wiiki hasn't been to many Moms Club events lately. She's been busy taking courses in digital-arts animation at a nearby community college, with assistance from the state-run worker-retraining program No Worker Left Behind. Since Michigan has created tax incentives to try to lure movie production to the state, Wiiki tells her friend, she thinks redirecting her design skills from autos to the arts might be a smart and rewarding career shift.

    Zaidi offers encouragement and shares her concerns. Her family will likely be moving after her husband finishes his residency, and she wishes they had rented rather than bought their home, because they will surely lose money on the sale and will need to pay back his hefty medical-school loans. Wiiki offers Zaidi a cup of chai. It's her own recipe, made from a mixture of spices and powdered milk that she keeps in an old coffee tin — a bit of afternoon luxury that she doesn't have to feel guilty about spending money on.

    At the Huchingsons', Deschaine says she can hardly wait to try out the tips she has picked up for cutting her grocery bill. She has already shaved about $1,000 off her monthly expenses by consolidating credit cards, switching to a cheaper car insurance and home-security system and cutting back on cable TV and long-distance calling. She beams with the satisfaction of sustaining sisterhood as she bounds out the door to take her kids to the community pool. "You gotta love this club," she says.

    The Real Housewives on TV can keep their designer dogs and over-the-top birthday parties. The women of the Grosse Pointe Moms Club are handling reality in their own way.

    This article originally appeared in the September 27, 2010 issue of Time magazine.

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