This Journalist Is Brought to You by ...

Can journalism be saved by product placement? I don't know, but I sure am thirsty

Illustration by John Ueland for TIME

The panic comes in the morning. As I sit at my desk and drink a tall glass of Pom Wonderful pomegranate juice, I start to worry about my career. I may be the best journalist in the world, but if there are no journals left to be journalisting for, I'll have to use my communication skills in some other way, like asking my parents for money.

That's why I've decided to save print journalism. My first idea was to get every reporter to switch beats and cover only cats doing funny things. Then I had some...

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