"President Bush signed a bill authorizing 700 miles of new fencing along the U.S.-Mexican border--which will be great until our Frisbee ends up over there." AMY POEHLER
"A strange thing happened last night. I had a knock on my door. A kid says, 'Trick or treat!' I said, 'Aren't you late?' He said, 'No, I'm dressed as a FEMA worker.'" JAY LENO
"A woman orders a salad in a Texas McDonald's and finds a rat in the salad. She calls the kid over and says, 'There's a rat in my salad!' And the kid says, 'Oh, that's your action figure.'" DAVID...
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