NOT SO MUCH CHARACTERS AS CARICATURES President Bush celebrates National Character Counts Week by headlining fund raisers for two of the G.O.P.'s biggest characters: macaca-tastic, pork-eating, sorta-Jewish Senator George Allen and Representative Don Sherwood, who has admitted a five-year extramarital affair with a woman who later accused him of choking her. He said it was just a back rub. Voters, too, aren't sure whether they're being strangled or massaged.
AND WITH KARL ROVE AS GOLLUM Senator Rick Santorum compares Iraq to the battle for Middle-earth in Tolkien's Lord of the Rings, noting that "as the hobbits are going up Mount Doom,...
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