Punchlines: May 1, 2006

"New White House chief of staff Josh Bolten is hinting that there are going to be some more changes in the works. The big rumor is he's going to fire President Bush and Vice President Cheney." JIMMY KIMMEL

"McDonald's is preparing to launch a campaign to counter the bad press to come with the release of a movie based on the book Fast Food Nation. Unfortunately, the campaign will be undermined by McDonald's Bacon Sundae Salad." TINA FEY

"A French woman is attempting to become the first person to windsurf across the Indian Ocean. It will be the first stunt like...

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