Punchlines: Mar. 6, 2006

"There was the big scandal at the Olympics. Authorities raided the Austrian team headquarters, found hundreds of syringes and drugs. They said there's enough stuff there to support a major league baseball team." --JAY LENO

"A firm owned by Dubai's government has purchased the rights to operate seaports in six major American cities, a move the White House approved without telling Congress. Even worse, everyone found out about the sale from that Texas quail-hunt rancher lady." --JON STEWART

For more political humor, visit time.com/cartoons

...

Want the full story?

Subscribe Now

Subscribe
Subscribe

Get TIME the way you want it

  • One Week Digital Pass — $4.99
  • Monthly Pay-As-You-Go DIGITAL ACCESS$2.99
  • One Year ALL ACCESSJust $30!   Best Deal!
    Print Magazine + Digital Edition + Subscriber-only Content on TIME.com

Learn more about the benefits of being a TIME subscriber

If you are already a subscriber sign up — registration is free!