Starting Time

Illustration for TIME by Mark Fredrickson

Person of the Week
HOT AIRNESS Everyone's got a Michael Jordan un-retiring rumor—Sports Illustrated, Washington Wizards' owner Abe Pollin, even golf buddy Mario Lemieux—and he's been playing some pickup ball. But why would M.J. diminish his legend just so the Wizards can lose by fewer points?


Winners
SCOTT EVERTZ
Bush pick for AIDS czar becomes first openly gay Republican presidential appointee. Strange, John Ashcroft always seemed like such a cheerful guy
FAT
The best thing to happen to liposuction since Suzanne Somers. Human blubber found to contain stem cells...

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