SHAQUILLE (FEE-FI-FO-FUM) O'NEAL
AGE: 31
OCCUPATION: Confounding puny players and tailors
BEST PUNCH:
Reigniting an old rivalry, O'Neal taunted his injured teammate, saying Bryant "should probably look to be more of a passer until he gets his legs strong."
KOBE (SAY-IT-AIN'T-SO-CHUM) BRYANT
AGE: 25
OCCUPATION: Taking explosive shots, fending off a rape charge
BEST PUNCH: Calling O'Neal "fat" on ESPN, Bryant said he may quit the team at season's end largely because of Shaq's "childlike selfishness and jealousy."
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